The Hotplate…the first grand finalist is decided…

Aron and Vanessa are cooking.  They’re doing a wallaby ragu for entrée with ricotta gnocchi…oh dear Tom’s never had wallaby before…and then poor Vanessa is crumbing something and Aron is taking over and carrying on about how she’s crumbing because she doesn’t have one wet hand and one dry hand and he can’t cope with that.

Then they start on a pea foam, which concerns Tom no end and Scott’s stressing about pork jowl…whatever the heck that is…oh we learn that it’s pork cheek and of course Aron’s never cooked with it before, honestly mate haven’t you heard of don’t try something new when you’re cooking for guests????

For dessert they’re doing poached pears and a chocolate mousse and Vanessa goes on about her natural cooking ability before pouring cream all over the bench and then asking if a teaspoon is smaller than a tablespoon…oh hell!!!  Then she tries to double 1&3/4…and struggles but somehow she came top of the state in maths, I kid you not!!!

The other dessert is a raspberry crème brulee tart, the tart shells look, but I can’t say the same about the raspberry that she’s putting into it, then she attempts to put the crème brulee in there.  Aron’s peeling prawns for the other entrée and poor Vanessa’s not going anywhere near them, bless her.

The other contestants arrive and god love her Tania’s in a leopard skin frock, oh honey how I love you in a good leopard skin frock.  Then Phillippe is a real gentlemen and pulls out the seat for one of the ladies…oh darling you are too sweet.  Christina tells Conrad and Liam to hurry up to the VIP naughty table, of course Conrad isn’t having that…he’s calling it the VIP table…are we surprised??? No of course not!!!  But Liam is impressed with the pretentious feeling in the restaurant, it’s his kind of air…oh honey.

God love Nols when Aron says they’re serving wallaby…she looks worried, I’m more worried about Christina’s palate when it comes to that, I’m thinking she won’t have that…strangely enough Nols orders the prawns instead of the wallaby and Christina and Tania hope it’s not wallaby on the menu and Liam tells Christina there’s no wallaby on the coat of arms, so there’s no excuse for her not to eat it.  Turns out 16 people ordered the wallaby and 14 ordered the prawns.  Lozz still thinks that her entrees will be better…darling I can’t wait to see you cook next.  Scott makes the fatal mistake of asking Lozz how much planning she’s put into this round and she turns on the waterworks and says how stressed she is and tired she is, oh honey, we’re not falling for that!!

Entrée goes out and they look spectacular, even Liam is impressed!!!  It’s all seeming good until Tom pulls something out of his mouth and we go to an ad break…damn!!!  Turns out it was a little bone…oh no.  Phillippe and Pascal both love the gnocchi.  Christina loves the prawns and then Lozz has a poop chute in her prawn!!!!!!  Tom says the gnocchi was almost prefect, then he says about the bone and says he still doesn’t know what wallaby tastes like.  Scott asks about the broth for the prawns and it’s based on chicken stock, Scott wanted more bollocks in it, then Scott mentions the poop chute in someone else’s prawns and poor Aron is devastated, well of course he should be.

While they’re waiting Christina and Tania are discussing Liam’s outfit and the poor bugger wishes he was deaf.  Meanwhile in the kitchen everything seems to be going well…until the pea foam is put on the plate, it looks good for a minute or so then starts to collapse.

Mains get taken out…and Marie thinks the dish she’s gotten looks a lot like hers, right down to the dark plate.  But all the people eating the pork aren’t overly keen on it…too much fat, not enough meat.  Scott asks how often they’ve cooked pork jowl and Aron’s stressing when he says he’s never cooked it before, then Scott goes into a story about how it took him 12 months to learn how to cook it, Aron’s stressing more and more and wants to hide under a chair…but of course there’s an ad break.  But then Scott tells Aron that it was sensational and that it’s not to everyone’s palate…oh where is Christina???  Then Scott tells Aron that he did push himself and should be proud of himself.  Tom on the other side wasn’t expecting the herb crust how it was, but it just about paid off and he loved the fried fetta and asked about the foam and wonders if it was a pure foam and thankfully he doesn’t like pure foam.

For dessert they’re hollowing the pears, crusting them with hazelnuts and then filling them with the mousse…mmmm yum, yes thanks I’ll have one of them.  Then Aron’s starting melting the sugar on the brulee tart and of course Phillippe’s been making crème brulee forever and a day, but of course Pascal is wanting warm custard in the tart and not cold custard.  I think they look great, but Liam’s not liking how excited Vanessa looks, his words are “she looks as excited as I do when I find one sock in the washing machine”…I never would have guessed he did his own shopping.  Nols thinks the pear dessert is perfect and most of them think the fennel biscotti brings the dish together and Pascal is ready to hug and spoon the crème brulee…oh this is going to a whole new level of weirdness.

Scott tells them that every element of the pear dessert was spectacular and Vanessa’s in shock and almost teary…oh bless her.  But of course he wanted more crème anglaise.  Tom says that the crème brulee tart was the best dessert that he’s eaten in the competition and Scott asks if Vanessa is the secret weapon!!!

Scoring time…so far Emi and Marie are on 79, Phillippe and Pascal are on 63.  They scored an average of 8/10 from the other diners and they got 20/30 from the other teams, so they’re on 28 so far.  Tom scores them 22/30, so they’re on 50…they get 21/30 from Scott giving them 71.

Emi and Marie are through to the grand final!!!  Whilst Phillippe and Pascal are out of the competition…oh how I will miss Phillippe’s cooking!

Next up is Lozz and Nols and it is either them or Aron and Vanessa into the grand final!!! Bring it on!!!


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