My Kitchen rules…new people

NSW newlyweds are opening up group two…and oh dear the poor girl is as nervous as she was on her wedding day…oh honey, honey, honey…but I am concerned that the hubby says that she cries quite a lot.  As for the fact that they work side by side as well…you need a break guys, working together and living together will get pretty full on.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh they’re not cooking Asian food…heck, where’s Little Misses Posh when you need them to tell us about every Asian country they’re been to.

So they’re shopping for lobster, please don’t sell them the one that just hit the floor…heck live lobsters, have fun girly, there will be screams in the kitchen later and that’s just from Mrs Newlywed….damn, they’ve gone for frozen lobster tails.  1½ hours just to buy lobster, no wonder they’re running through Coles.

Heck they’ve gone American camping food for dessert…camping is not the same as home restaurant competition food…honey I’m concerned!!  1½ hours for Coles…heaven help if they actually walked, it would have been a heck of a lot longer.

Pete’s already concerned about main as it’s a pie…”this better be one damn good pie” he’s got a point though…and look, they’ve made their own pastry…are you watching Little Misses Posh, other people are making their own pastry, and not stressing over it.

Now Mrs Newlywed has called Mr Newlywed babe and darling…this may change her name soon.  All this babe and darling has confused her darling over how much sugar he’s put in…the poor boy has lost count, not hard darling.  Actually darling may be called Mr Ditzy soon, he’s losing count, he’s losing the sieve, he’s losing the bowl…and he keeps calling her darling…and then he’s left the bag of ice on top of the frozen lobster tails…Darling Ditzy, you’re a classic.

Good thing that everyone is expecting Asian food…this will make things fun…but telling everyone that they’re standing in unity and togetherness and they should enjoy each other’s company…oh darling, darling, darling it is a competition…but then again you’ve only just met.

So let’s meet the other new groups…

SA mums – they show and share their love through cooking…we’ll wait to judge that I think

Qld old bloke and trophy wife – I’m sorry but the look on her wife when you say “look what I’ve got” is scaring me…as for the drinking of bubbly while driving the golf cart…yeah I prefer bubbly while stable.  Just to put it in context Old Bloke has a child who’s 30 and one who’s 32 and Trophy Wife is 31…apparently they play well together.

Tasmania BFFs – do people seriously call each other BFFs???  Good to hear they’ve mastered the deep fryer, I mean nearly every team has used one so far.

Vic boys – down boys…I don’t reckon there will be much action with the Tassie girls.  I agree though girls definitely like guys who can cook…can someone whip me up a bit of dinner now???  Just asking!!!  Within minutes the BFFs decide that the boys are like their brothers.

WA friends – the miner and the interior designer…oh hell she’s travelled the world twice.  It’s sounding like travel on MKR is a Perth thing…but does she wear the pants and not the BFG miner.

The question is who will fawn over Pete and Manu…looks like it’s the BFFs and trophy wife…no surprises there I guess.

The menu is revealed and Old Bloke isn’t happy….he wanted Japanese, um didn’t them mention something about being Chinese…I’m confused….Darling needs to keep away from Ditzy Darling, you’ll confuse the poor man.

Entrée – grilled lobster with pumpkin dipping soup and pancetta crisp….crisis with the lobster cooking…there’s too many undercooked portions…put them back in the damn pan!!!  Seriously…at the rate they’re going it will be cold lobster apart from that one last plate.  Now the plate looks flash, but honestly three little pieces of lobster with a couple of mouthfuls of soup…it better taste spectacular.  Darling and Ditzy Darling look like they’re about to keel over…the pressure before the comment from Manu is too much for them…at least he says the lobster is cooked perfectly.  Now we all need to remember to season the dish…poor Pete is struggling.  At least Manu is giving some good constructive criticism…good on you Manu.  Bugger Miss WA got raw lobster, as did the Vic boys and Old Mate is not enjoying his pumpkin, I’m guessing too baby food like for him.

Main – lamb shank pie with pea mash.  I’m sorry but I haven’t had mashed peas and pie…don’t worry Vic Boy you didn’t sound like a dumb dumb.  Oh hell Miss WA is craving the shank bone…I think darling may disappoint you.  I’m concerned…runny sauce and close to mushy meat…don’t stab yourself in the foot with the bone.  Okay it looks nice, but it is technically a pie???  And yes darling you should have made spares…you’re just lucky they made it in one piece and not a million little pieces.  Gee WA girl is not backwards in being forwards, tell us exactly what you think honey.  Manu loves the presentation however he wants the sauce…strange about that!!!  Lesson number 2 – don’t forget Manu’s sauce!!!  Back to lesson number 1 – don’t forget Pete’s seasoning.  WA girl, honey, stop talking now…you’re talking, talking, talking…eat your limited bit of lamb shank meat and be quiet.

Dessert – S’mores Pie.  Well the biscuit base with brownies on top looks great…as for the piped marshmellow get soft and sloppy, yeah that’s not looking so great.  The blowtorch has made the marshmellow slightly moor presentable…but what’s with the smidge of crème fraiche.  But guess what Miss WA doesn’t think it’s a pie…well honey you didn’t think that the main was a pie either.  Oh heck, Pete sums it up quickly “just because it’s sweet doesn’t mean it’s good.”  The sugar confusion for Ditzy Darling is coming back to haunt him!  At least the BFFs seemed to enjoy the sugar hit.


WA – 5

SA – 6

Tas –5

Vic – 5

Qld – 4


Entrée – Pete 5, Manu 5

Main – Pete 6, Manu 6

Dessert – Pete 3, Manu 3

Total score of 53

Next time we’re off to… Qld.


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